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Team Talk: What would you do with $1,000,000?

This month, we ask the team the age-old question: If you won a million dollars (or denomination of your choice), how would you spend it?

The question was almost guaranteed to bring a raft of hilarious replies that showcase our amazing humour and wit.

Once again, we fall short and instead worry about taxation and retirement.

You can't give it away these days.

Marc S
I couldn't decide on whether to answer this with what I would 'like' to do with it, or what I would actually do with it, so figured I would answer both. [So you just upgraded to $2,000,000? geez - Editor]

If it was just what I would like to do with it, then I would probably follow the F1 season around the globe for a few years until I got bored. I'm very much into the sport, and with the locations, it would make for some great destinations to visit in between the races.

What I would actually do is pay off my mortgage, buy another 3 reasonably priced houses to rent out to others, and live off the investment. Given I would then have a constant income without doing much, I would then try my hand at starting a business. Not entirely sure what that business would be to be honest [How to understand people with strong accents? - Editor], but I'm not the kind of person who would be able to just retire, without it driving me to insanity.


I know nothing of F1, so hopefully this is OK

Pay off all of my debts. Buy a house. Put away some in a nice savings account both for me and my kiddos. Buy a serious amount of shoes, and get a few cosmetic tweaks.


Who doesn't love shoes?

If I had a million dollars, I'd pay off debts, stash some money away for savings and to have a healthy cushion [You give your soft furnishings a health check? - Editor], and I'd probably use a good chunk of it for travel. There are a lot of places I'd like to see in the world still and travelling is expensive.

I’d like to visit some of the top touristy spots in South America, like Rio, Galapagos islands, Peru, Machu Picchu, etc. I’d like to see Australia, Japan, China, Alaska, the northern lights in the Arctic, and I would like to make it back to Europe at some point, particularly to see more of Italy and visit Greece.


It's where we first met.

I’ll go with my sailing boat dream which is still is a thing for my retirement, but if I would get tomorrow $1,000,000 I would do it right now too. [How? You're not getting the money until tomorrow - Editor]
Get a Katamaran and sail sail sail... depending on time and budget and people.. mediterran sea, caribbean sea, then around South America, US west costs , Hawaii, Philippines , India. Around Africa .. back to Mediterran Sea.

If I had $1,000,000 tomorrow, I'd probably be fairly sensible [Boring- Editor] by paying off the mortgage and spending some cash on finishing renovating the house. Then I'd buy either a Mustang GT or a Tesla Model 3 Performance (I know, one is an eco-machine and one is a gas guzzler!). The remainder I'd split between savings and stock market investment.

Mark H
A million dollars….. well, the government takes about 1/3 of that first off, so after taxes you get ~ $650,000. With that I’d pay off the house and credit card, buy a reliable vehicle, then the rest goes in the bank. Would not have enough to retire, even at my age. [It wouldn't last 2 years? - Editor] But it would eventually make retirement easier.


The fun answer.

I would pay off my mortgage, buy a 2019 Corvette ZR1 (plus pay off following speeding tickets) and probably go to Australia. Then save the rest for a rainy day or you know, retirement.

Mark W
I live in Sydney, so probably buy a small apartment and carry on as normal. [How small is your current apartment? - Editor]


Good day.

I'm not a huge fan of travelling, but I'd like to see a little bit more of the USA. I've been to Los Angeles, Nevada, Las Vegas, New York and Virginia but I'd like to see more of the middle bit too. Definitely Miami and New Orleans. [Dude, you need to check a map to see which states are in the middle - Editor]

I love my work too much to think about retiring but I'd put some away for when I do.

I might give some to my family if they ask nicely and are reading this (hopefully they are not).


Yes I can.

Andy (Andy did not contribute this month, so this reply is 100% fictional)
I'd be too depressed with the massive income drop to think about how to eek out such a pittance.

Lindy (Lindy never contributes, despite being threatened with a fabricated answer)
I'd probably invest in a gas-tech company, buy more cars I'll only drive 3 days a year and spend the rest in Vegas.

Charles (Charles also never contributes, so this is also fabricated)
Please do not say funny things about me.
Charles also has edit permissions to this blog.

So there you have it, that's how we'd choose to spend a cool $1,000,000.

We'd love to hear how you'd spend your imaginary windfall.

Edited by Matt



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Oh boy. The very first thing that I would do is quit my job. (I am stuck at a job that I hate.) Next I would pay off my mortgage and my student loan debt. Buy a villa with a pool, a nice car and put a considerable size of money apart for a rainy day. I would help my loved ones as well financially and I would also invest in something. And with the rest I would really enjoy myself with my utter time freedom and not worry about the financial stuff anymore. 


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Well I would pay off my student loan which is really my only debt. Then I'd get into some investing to multiply the money and live off that. I would probably travel but not all the time. I would also buy a good new car (Nothing fancy so I don't attract attention)  and of course buy all of the IPS apps (even the ones I have no need for lol)  

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I'd hire every Mercenary from coast to coast that one million dollars would buy to hunt down Boko Haram (in an undisclosed contract) and everyone that profited from the abduction of Leah Sharibu. This little girl was one of the children kidnapped by the terrorist organization Boko Haram in Africa.

Imagine what I'd do if I had the financial resources of Soros.

Anyways, this is one of the girls that Obama said he would not rest until they were all brought home:


Edited by Christforums
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I see travel being a common theme. Guys, having a pretty active travel community in the most undeveloped EU country I can definitely say that you don't need a million dollars to travel. Just don't let your life pass by while you wait for the million 🙂

Mark S, this is me at the SPA grand prix last weekend. Amazing race that is totally worth the 4h traffic jam after it:


Edited by jair101
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If I won $1,000,000 Linvision bucks, I would:

- buy a plane ticket for @Morrigan so we could go shoe shopping.  There is an amazing premium outlet mall near me with a fine selection of men and women's shoes.  Also, good men's dress shoes cost a small fortune so I'm allocating half my money to shoes.  

- Apple Hermes-edition Watches for the entire IPS team.  So when I yell at them about not building me a mobile app, I can now ping their phone, wrist, and monitor.  Also, it's an inspiration for furure development of IPS to display on wearables once they're done with the mobile app.  

- an IPS-themed coffee mug

- an IPS-themed mousepad that's Charles-sized 

- a regular 20 oz. cup since I don't actually drink coffee, but I do make lots of smoothies 

- buy @Mark for a day since he's cute.  But if he turns out to be boring and only talk about work, I might throw a rubicks cube at him

- a rubicks cube

- one of those fun outings in Napa Valley where you make your own wine.  I don't actually drink, but if I were to get drunk, it would be fitting to get drunk on the power from stomping on thousands of helpless grapes.  I'm sure there's an analogy in here about overzealous forum administration.  

- a dedicated IP for Sendgrid. Haha yeah right, I'm too cheap for that.  Let me stay with my free plan on Sparkpost.  

- an overnight stay in the snow igloo of Finland's Lucky Ranch.  Because freezing yourself in the dead of winter, lost in the wilderness, is kind of like a metaphysical representation of being a solo admin, except we do it every night.  By choice.  

- to ride on the back of a Galapagos turtle.  Something about climate change ruining the worlds environment, so one last joyride during my lifetime would be nice.  

- buy a pet Koala.  They're lazy, fat, eat eucalyptus leaves all day, and sleep for the rest.  And even though they're cute, they're a reminder of what #lifegoals shouldnt be, even when you have a millionaire sugar daddy. 

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I'd pay off the rest of the mortgage and then say to my better half "I've got £965,000. As soon as you want to, give up work."

And the reason I'd do that is because she's worked her socks off over the years in a job she really dislikes, long hours under stress, to put us in a position where we can have lots of holidays and still be not far off paying the mortgage in one third of the time we were supposed to. I do my bit but I earn far less for doing something that I enjoy. Once we're in the clear, she's earned the right never to have to work again if she doesn't want to. And a 5% return on £965k (around £48k) is more than we need to live very comfortably, so I suppose I might find it tempting to give up too in this situation.

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I would buy a house at Killesberg - one of the most epensive regions in my hometown (maybe i need 2 or 3 Millions😞 )... .

I would also  invite @Daniel F, because i like austrians and he is - also - a great guy ... and @Joel R for his humor (but only, if he invites me to the US, because i love America 🙂 )

After that, i would post a ticket to @Lindy every day, setting my licenses to unlimited (LIfetime)... Probablly the hardest part 😄 (Probablly, i should invite @Matt to the event with Daniel and Joel... This MAY help triggering Lindy 🙂 - and i am pretty sure, this british guy would be able to generate the best breakfast of all of us at that event 🙂 (but - finally - WE have have the best beer 🍺)

Yep, i'll do that... Good idea... Let's start... (.... just need the money 🙂 )

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  • Management

I love hearing your ideas.

I am also reminded of the scene where Dr Evil demands a million dollars or else, and everyone starts laughing as the value of that sum is significantly less than it was in the 60s.

It's a real eye opener when you search for dream properties with your newly won million and realise that you have to seriously reign in your expectations!

Maybe next month we'll do "What would you do with a  Billion that you had to spend in a week"

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